When my beloved Crain Terrier Truckee passed away, the pain was overwhelming. I was very sad, could not sleep well, and missed important deadlines.

For many people, losing a pet feels just as devastating as losing a human family member, and that reaction is completely normal. Truckee, like other pets, had weaved himself deeply into our  family’s daily routines and emotional lives. He offered unconditional love, companionship, and comfort.  His absence leaves a gap that feels impossible to fill.

Grieving a pet often mirrors human grief because the emotional bonds between humans and their pets are rooted in the same attachment systems. Neuroscientists have found that our brains process feelings of connection to pets in ways like how we connect with people. When a pet “goes over the rainbow,” that bond is broken, activating the same grief pathways. This helps explain why sadness, guilt, and even physical symptoms like fatigue or appetite changes can occur following the death of a pet.

The pain of pet loss is also amplified by several unique factors. Unlike many human relationships, our connection with animals is uncomplicated and free of judgment. Pets don’t disappoint us in the ways people sometimes do. They provide steady affection and acceptance, becoming trusted witnesses to our emotional lives. When they’re gone, it can feel like losing a member of our family, our routine, and even our identity as caregivers.

Adding to the challenge, society doesn’t always give pet grief the recognition it deserves. Friends or coworkers might not understand why you’re still upset weeks or months later. It’s important to give yourself permission to mourn as deeply and as long as you need to, without minimizing your pain.

Healing from pet loss takes time and self-compassion. Some people find comfort in creating rituals, for example putting together a photo album, planting a tree, or writing a letter of goodbye. Others may connect with support groups or counselors who specialize in pet bereavement.

What ever way you grieve, know that your sorrow reflects the love you had for your special pet. Losing a pet is losing family, and that love, though painful now, remains part of you forever.

Resources for grieving the loss of a pet:

  • In Philadelphia, many veterinarian practices offer support groups to grieving pet parents. Ask your trusted vet provider if they host a group.
  • The Association for Pet Loss and Bereavement offers online chat rooms, counselor referrals, and weekly virtual support group meetings led by trained volunteers.
  • Grief Healing Discussion Groups features a dedicated pet loss section forum and moderated online environments for sharing stories and receiving peer support.

If pet loss is affecting your mental health and you’re concerned you may be experiencing pet loss depression or anxiety after pet loss, take a screening. If you’re in crisis, call or text 988.